…Ī new variation in the game of bridge - in which thecards are looked at briefly, then torn in half andthrown in your opponent’s face - has been invented bya poor sport in Boston. The large fatty hump was used as adoorstop, the hide was used for kites, and the hornswere used as fake buck teeth. … Sorry aboutthat, Tipper.Ĭontrary to long-held belief, anthropologists now saythat American Indians wasted literally every part ofthe buffalo. … And you know what? He made Tip O’Neill runall the way from Washington to Des Moines just so hecould win it. President Reagan entered ahog-calling contest in Iowa last Thursday. … What’s with thatwhite thing, Johnny? Get a hold of that, okay?… Newsweek magazine’s cover story this week wason Federal Reserve Chairman Paul Volcker whom theyrefer to as “the second most powerful man in America.”The most powerful man, of course, for obvious reasons,is singer-actor John Davidson. Both are said to be lookingforward to meeting, dining together - and having someserious discussions about hair loss. This is Anatoly Sharansky and hehas been invited to visit New York by Mayor Ed Koch. Yorktown, whichis capable of shooting down hundreds of targets atonce and can simultaneously track everything in theMediterranean that moves, smacked into a rock todayand sank.
Dennis miller weekend ujpadatre update#
Now, to interpret this news story and its effecton you, here’s the James Brown hit single “Living inAmerica” and the Weekend Update Dancers, ladies andgentlemen!ĭennis Miller: That’s not exactly Scotty Restonbut, then again, have you ever seen his legs? …Obviously, you’ve seen Scotty’s legs a lot.America’s– …Īmerica’s newest supership, the U.S.S. Influenza’s back in the news and the Center forDisease Control in Atlanta has announced that thisyear will see the most widespread flu epidemic since1981. … Geraldine Ferraro, reached for a comment, said, “Ican’t explain any of this but, you know, I’m sure gladI kept my own last name.” … who … last year pleadedguilty to real estate fraud. … School psychiatrists said youngJohn had a deep-seated need to compete with hisfather, John Zacarro, Sr. Geraldine Ferraro’s son, John Zacarro, Jr., was bustedfor cocaine possession yesterday at Vermont’sMiddlebury College.
… Talk aboutnot havin’ a date for the prom, huh? … You know, if you think about it,that’s only three more than I had - I didn’t even run, you know? … This guy spent fortymillion dollars and I almost tied him. Youknow, it’s been over a year and I can’t even rememberthe final count but, when I went to bed, Reagan hadfive hundred ninety-eight electoral votes - Mondalehad three. Walter Mondale finally resurfaced this week and saidhe still can’t believe how bad he got stomped. And this morning,in the smartest move of the year, the distantthird-ranking soft drink, Royal Crown, bought theentire water supply of North America. Three weeks ago, Pepsi-Cola bought 7-Up and, thisweek, Coca-Cola bought Dr. In balloting done by the Hop SingInstitute of Virginia City, Nevada, President Marcoshas been named Houseboy of the Year by thatprestigious organization. A spokesman for the StateDepartment, in a carefully worded statement, said: “I don’t want him,you can have him, he’s too fat for me.” …
The United States this week denied entry to formerHaitian president Jean-Claude Duvalier, currentlyliving in France.
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